Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Thank You

                                         I'm just now getting to use my computer today since my youngest has hijacked it. It's crunch time for her with the end of the school year and she's had several papers to write. I started to reply to everyone's comments and decided to heck with it I'll comment in a post.
                                    Thank you all for your support and all the cyber hugs, I really needed that. We did get a chance to talk briefly over the weekend and it went well. I let him know that I was feeling neglected and he acknowledged that he had been neglecting that part of our relationship. I also let him know how his seeming lack of interest and the fact that the lack of intimacy doesn't seem to phase him makes me feel. He assured me that he's still very interested and it bothers him too and asked that I be patient while he makes the adjustment with the new job. He also seemed quite amused by the fact that I've been "frustrated" by this dry spell.  His eyes actually lit up and he got a wicked grin on his face when I told him how frustrated I was. 
                                 Just knowing that he understands where I'm coming from and that he's also feeling a little frustrated goes a long way in reassuring me and calming my fears. I know I shouldn't doubt him or us, but sometimes those old insecurities rear their ugly heads. I am getting better at beating them back. Before I would have sulked for awhile and lashed out at him, but as everyone reminded me communication works much better. There were no arguments, tears or nasty remarks and we even got a chance to play  a little and reconnect. So thank you all once again for reminding me to do what I should have done in the first place.
                               

10 comments:

  1. Mrs. D,

    I admire your communication skills with your husband. Bravo for staying calm.

    I hope that you continue on this course with lots more intimacy.

    Hug,
    joey

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    1. Thank you Joey, it's amazing what calmly talking can accomplish.

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  2. I am happy you were able to put yourself out there, and open the door of communication. At times it can be hard, but you did it anyway. I would imagine he was also happy that you put it out there, allowing you two to be on the same page.

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    1. You would think after 25 years it would be easy, but sometimes I expect him to just know and sometimes I'm afraid to bother him when he's dealing with crap of his own. I just need to remember that I don't have to be afraid to let him know what I need.

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  3. Glad you talked and hope you find the time to connect soon. Those darn insecurities can really surprise you at the most inopportune times...glad you shared your feelings instead of letting the insecurities win...it is hard to do sometimes... :-) Hugs

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    1. It surprises me that I can still be so insecure sometimes, but it's something that I'm working on and getting better with.

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  4. Yes- Me too- Happy you talked and are on a better path.

    ~faithful

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    1. Thanks, we're both happier since we talked.

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  5. So glad things are better. Kudos for not letting the insecurities and past behavior win. You've come a long ways!!
    :)

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  6. I've still got a ways to go, but I'm getting there.

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